


Buried Memories

by RandomTranslations



Category: Senki Zesshou Symphogear
Genre: Childhood Trauma, F/F, Fluff and Angst, Implied Relationships, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Psychological Trauma, References to Holocaust, Trauma, Yuri is implied, fis
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-06
Updated: 2018-02-07
Packaged: 2019-03-14 14:46:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13592346
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RandomTranslations/pseuds/RandomTranslations
Summary: Kirika never cared about the past before the white walls of the FIS, but after singing her swan song, unlocking part of her memories, she will force herself to do so.





	1. Prologue

I got up like a spring from the bed, I was lying down, I couldn't breathe properly and I felt cold, very cold. I looked at the window, it was closed, I looked at my body, nothing out of the ordinary, I was still wearing the same old pajama that Mom gave me, Maria and Shirabe when we left the white walls of the FIS.

I let myself fall to my previous position by extending my arms and legs, this bed feels so big –and any other– if Shirabe is not sleeping with me and hugging me, it also feels so ... lonely.

Paying more attention to my environment I noticed that it was raining and that it was so windy that my window made as much noise as if it were going to come out of its place. I turned my head back to the ceiling and then covered my face with my right hand, I sighed, it would be better to wet my face and distract myself a bit before going back to sleep.

I looked at my reflection in the mirror, I could see that I would soon be 17, or well, according to the FIS, my body was similarly developed than Hibiki-san –or even more– and she is supposed to be older. Things like these sometimes make me wonder if that really is my real age, what would really be my real name, where I really am from. Now standing in front of the bathroom mirror that we all share, I take the loose hair of my bangs between my fingers, blond and wavy, not black and straight like Shirabe's. I approach the mirror looking at my green eyes, I could easily say that I am a Japanese and that I treat my hair if it were not for the shape of my eyes, the same way that Maria's eyes, a foreigner, and other shared features have, as well be almost imperceptible, in our faces that make us different from Shirabe, from Tsubasa-san, from Hibiki-san, Miku-san and everyone around us maybe except Chris-Senpai, because she was a perfect mix between the foreigner and what Japanese

The deep voice with an angry tone speaking the same language with which the alchemists sang the first time before invoking the snake that is not yet disappears from my head. I also listen to another more affectionate voice that speaks to me, but I don't understand what is that she's is telling me, it is a different language, but, it makes me feel calm, it sprouts me a calm like the one Maria gives me and, for some reason, I feel that language as not totally unknown.

I dip my face with the water from the sink and clean myself with the towel on the side. The best thing is go back to sleep, although Shirabe I doubt that I will achieve it. Her warmth wraps me up on this kind of nights. I want the top brass to stop monitoring us, then Shirabe will be able again to return to my room, I don't like being away from her.

I stopped in front of my room where, even with all the darkness, it shines my name: Akatsuki Kirika.

 

 

 


	2. My life in the ignorance

"It hurts dess!" I complained immediately after Shirabe started disinfecting the scratches on my arms. A few minutes ago, we had just started Sport's class, but in an unexpected accident towards Shirabe, I surrounded her and I fell down the stairs protecting her with my body; luckily it was not a very considerable height and I managed to maneuver a little, thanks to that I ended up with quite a few scratches and a very worrisome wound in my head... For those who do not know my work or do not spend so much time with me; that the favorite target of Chris-senpai's blows does not mean that I get rid of them when I finish with her patience.

"That will make you think twice before hurting yourself" Shirabe told me by pressing the cotton with alcohol in one of the scratched places.

"But it was to protect you dess!" I defended myself "DESS!" Shirabe made an annoyed face tightening the cotton.

"That's exactly what I mean," She said. "You always throw you straight into danger without caring about anything just to protect someone, like when you sang your Zesshou , or like when we fought with Micha, ah, and how to forget when you wanted to kill yourself with Igalima's scythe..."

"I get it, I already get it dess!" I interrupted Shirabe embarrassed that she brought those memories, past is past they tell you.

If you wonder why Shirabe is the one who attends me, it is because it was the change of nurses when we arrived and luckily the doctor of terror was still not there.

"Now let's see how ugly the wound on your forehead is." Shirabe said taking some gauze "You worried us when you fell unconscious."

"I also scared Dess. I did not know if you were okay."

Shirabe blushed and muttered something I could not hear. Followed by this she came a little closer to me and now I felt my face burn as she had her face so close examining mine. Her always soft and delicate hands rested on my neck and on my forehead. Her right hand swept the hair of my forehead, first cleaning the little blood that had sprouted.

"Something's wrong?" I asked when Shirabe frowned.

"You have a scar quite close to the birth of your hair" She answered in a monotone voice "When did you do it?"

"A scar?" I raised my hand trying to feel where it was, I didn't know what she was talking about. The only thing I achieved was that my head to hurt. I grimaced.

"Later you will tell me, first I will attend you."

"Shirabe, I do not remember having scars dess."

She looked at me sadly.

"Then you did it before the FIS... "I smiled trying to lighten the atmosphere and caress her sideburns.

"It doesn't matter; it's in the past dess."

Then we continued in silence while Shirabe bandaged my head after applying an ointment or cream (I do not know what it was) and when we finished we went to resume classes.

And now... Now I feel like I want to die for this horrible headache that, curiously, now is not the fault of the kind of calculation or poetry, it is fault of one of my favorite subjects, History, although well, I didn't put anything of attention since I spent it trying to remember how and where I had done the scar that Shirabe mentioned. The bell marked the break a couple of minutes ago but I still without moving from my place.

"Are you okay, Kiri-chan?" I looked up to find a worried Shirabe.

"Yes, it only hurts my head a little" I smiled.

"In that case, it would be better to go to the infirmary" I could feel my terror face at this, the nurse had already arrived and I was afraid of her! DX

"Dess, dess!" I shook my head with my hands crossed "I'm fine!"

"Are you sure?" She looked at me questioningly. "You've been acting strange since Elfnein checked you last time. Not to mention that you just hurt yourself."

I tensed a bit for the first thing she said, since then those strange dreams did not let me sleep my eight hours a day and I end up recovering in class as Hibiki-san.

"It's because we have not slept together since then!" I sang aloud and stood up attracting the attention of the classmates who were in the classroom, consequently, Shirabe blushed and I just laughed uncomfortably, the blow did not hurt at all, it was like a small migraine, sure it'll disappear in a while. "Sorry dess."

"I-It does not matter anymore" she took my hand "Do you want to go out in what's left of break?"

"That's usually my line Dess" I Reclaimed amused.

"The changes don't come badly from time to time" Shirabe said in the same tone I used. I could only smile feeling as the headache began to leave. I really appreciate Shirabe. I don't know what would have happened to me if we had not met. We entered class again after twenty minutes to continue seeing about the biggest war in which Japan and Germany were allies as I was able to understand everything that I missed. For some reason I felt uncomfortable, I renew myself in my place and began to bang my pen against the desk.

"Kiri-chan?" The teacher continues talking about more actions that Germany took, I feel that my head starts to hurt again, I lean my head on my shoulder and squeeze my eyes tight.

"That's all for today" I heard the teacher say and I immediately opened my eyes. Shirabe looked at me coldly and took me by the hand standing up.

"Shirabe?"

"We're going to the infirmary." Simply I got carried away, when Shirabe was in imperative mode it was better never to contradict her, the only time I did it I ended with a little fear of Shirabe in mad mode, but I must also admit that she looks so Grrr...

"Kiri-chan, stop thinking about weird things."

"D-Dess?!"

"Your face tells me everything."

I sighed and walked down the huge corridor that led to the infirmary. Once the door opened, the nurse sighed when she saw us, it was not like we were frequent in the place, but let's say that the nurse and I already had a certain history.

"What is this time, Akatsuki-san?" The nurse barely looked up from the papers.

"I fell off the stairs this morning and Shirabe is very worried about me" I said earning a reproachful look from Shirabe. The nurse looked at me incredulous, noticing then the bandages on my head.

"Kiri-chan has had headaches since she fell, she just could not open her eyes and her head tightened."

"Come here, Akatsuki-san." I sat down again in the bed of the infirmary while the nurse examined the cures that Shirabe did to me, apparently giving an okay or something. "I have not seen anything wrong with her. Surely it is a migraine for some other reason such as bad eyesight, too much heat, too much stress or something of that style."

Shirabe and I exchanged glances. Time passed quickly after that, we arrived at the submarine again. We breathed tranquility, maybe...

"Even so, we will continue here for a while longer" Damn it... another old man is still undecided about what's happening here.

At the insistence of Shirabe, I ended up doing another checkup now with Elfnein, the mega genius. As I expected, I had nothing. I went to Shirabe's room to help me do the homework and then, as the old man's presence dictated, I stayed to sleep in my own room. At this rate I should bring my clothes from Shirabe's room, if the senior officers stay too long I doubt I can sleep with her too long.

* * *

I can't sleep ... It's already the second week that I keep hearing those voices in my dreams...

From where they come? I want to know…

I touch my bandages, the headache invades me again. That kind voice reminds me of Maria.

Why can't I remember?

Why do I feel sad?

What am I afraid of?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN.
> 
> I'm preparing you with a slight humor before starting with the whole angst in this fic. Please, put atention to the small details. I just left here some clues here. By the way...
> 
> I have some days without sleep, so im sleepy.
> 
> Good night and see ya'
> 
> TN.
> 
> I'm wondering what upload first, Gems cyan and blue topaz, seduction or the other request i have...
> 
> Thanks fo readin'

**Author's Note:**

> AN.
> 
> Here it is the prologue of my new fanfic (if you wonder what will happen with "product" it'll be back again in new year) where the protagonist is Kirika and a crazy theory of what could be her life before de FIS thanks to the inspiration in my classes of Universal History and the songs Tegami and Okitegami.
> 
> Obviously the extension of the chapters will not be the same of this and I don't know how long I'll take writting them.
> 
> By the way, what do you think.
> 
> TN.
> 
> Yeah, yeah... I'm getting into debt I alredy know, but this seems so interesting and was short so...
> 
> Keep waiting for Seductions this week.
> 
> See ya'
> 
> RandomTranslations


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